Ugh, pretty much what happened.
So… Ivan came home! SHIT WENT DOWN. Okay, okay okay! I’ll give you the details!
Oh god! Well, Ivan came home and he was so aggressive. I ran into the living room and it was a mess, the couch was flipped, my TV smashed onto the floor, the coffee tables was flipped, my fake plants were all over the floor, frames broken. But, everything in one certain corner was perfectly fine a lamp that was turned on, and the sofa. Who had a muscular man sitting in it. I was so confused, so I decided to walk towards them. It was Ivan and he was intoxicated. He was gulping down his vodka and his hand and face were covered in blood, the dim light that came from the lamp. There was blood on the floor and it said ‘I’m back’. I was scared so I lightly spoke towards him, “Ivan? What’s wrong?” I didn’t want him to feel attacked or threatened. He just stared at me and undid his pants, and he told me with the most unbelievable American accent and said, “Suck me off. I’m in the mood” and I was in utter most shock! I told him to get the fuck out and that none of that perverted illusion he must have made up in his mind was going to happen.
That only pissed him off, he threw his bottle of vodka at me, I was so distracted in dodging it and wondering what it smashed against, that the Russian had disappeared from his seat. I looked back at it and walked towards it, that the Russian shoved me onto it and pinned me down. Oh god.. I don’t know if I should continue, what if he finds out?! Oh, forget it! Just…
Well, after he pinned me down he started mumbling these crazy things, I didn’t understand anything! He then growled when he asked me something and he just smacked me across the face when I tried mumbling a response. He was so aggressive, I must admit I was… Aroused somewhat. But, moving on! He caressed my cheek after he smacked it, I tried squirming but he only got angrier. So, I decided to stay still. He said he loved me and that he hated me so much. He kissed me tenderly and I was so scared. I don’t know if I reacted from fear or from god knows what. But, I kissed him back. After that everything went black. I remember waking up chained to a bed, where Ivan decided to… -gulps- Well you know! I don’t want to say it… You probably don’t want to hear it…
Too be honest, I may be a hero, but as a hero with no one to even cherish or love. To witness or kiss, to caress their cheek. I feel like I am no one, no one at all. As if I had not even a small right, to kiss another or even have a family. I am no hero, I am no one. No one at all. I have fallen, slit my veins, became a drug addict and what have I received in return? Not even the simplest of a… Thank you…
I have fallen in love, I have dated, been engaged, I was married to a lovely man… But, each time, each time… One is born, they are taken away from me. The mother never letting me see the child ever again, they act… Such ugly monsters with masks of angels.
I couldn’t stand it anymore, I couldn’t. I tried taking my life away, I did! I did! You can’t tell me I didn’t, that stupid Russian saved me though… We dated, but… He left me, I am such a fool, such a fool. I’m only a monster as well, I wanted to beg for forgiveness, I knew that I was sticking my nose in business. But, I’m the jealous type and you seemed to love her so much, forgive me.
I’m not sure, what else to tell you readers, perhaps all I can say is…:
Love Is Wonderful To Witness, Until You Suffer From Its Beauty.
Well, like Ivan returned today. But, I’m going to allow him back into the house as if nothing. I’ll make that bitch beg like never before. I feel so disrespected… And unloved. Besides, Arthur has been keeping an eye on me, he’s worried. Cause, I may have started cutting myself again… And it’s not my fault, it’s Ivan’s! He mistreats me and he doesn’t care anymore about my feelings and I’m so hurt… At least, Arthur bothered taking care of me…
Basically, I’ve been waiting for Ivan still. But, now it just doesn’t matter. He’s been ignoring me for so many days! I can’t stand it! I just want him to come home.. But, besides that.. China came to me today.. The one I loved… Not Chuuguko… If not Zhonggou… He was soaking wet and he came in.. SOmething about Ivan being dead.. I’m not sure what exactly happened but it wasn’t heroic at all… So, now Yao is crashing on my couch while I wait till Ivan returns…
Hopefully, He’ll be back soon…
Well, today I was waiting for Ivan… Ugh! He’s like… Hasn’t been home for awhile! It pisses me off! How can /I/ a hero, be a hero if their villain doesn’t show up!? Jeeze, he is such a fattie! I haven’t had intercourse for more then two weeks! Do you know how that is? I find it sooo, irritating! But, it doesn’t matter… I’ll get him… Just you wait, Ivan >:C
So, besides that. Gn-Truby, actually thought he could rape me today and I sooo, taught him a lesson! I whooped his butt! >:O And he ran home crying, I bet Ivan would be proud of me…. Where’s Ivan? I MISS YOU!! Q~Q STOP LEAVING ME.
Oh, besides that like always, Arthur was being an addict and stuufffff….. Let me see… I think that’s about it.. Sheesh! Today was boring, Maybe! Tomorrow will be even better!
So, tell me guys.
Should I beat the crap out of Ivan, now. Or wait till he gets home? C:
And I’ll be the hero~!
Heh, just finished saving some kids from adoption. <3